Superficiality and Substance
Ever wondered what might be reason that abundance is attracted by those who don’t bother in scarcity?
Humans are happier in anticipation than in acquiring. A person would be happier in the anticipation of getting rich, rather than actually getting rich. At least, the majority is. Also the reason why abundance is attracted by those who don’t bother in scarcity.
Anticipation is necessarily what an animal lives for. The moment right before eating your favorite food is more rewarding than eating food. The dopamine spike is at its peak right before getting something you desire. It is our innate trait to desire things.
In the world of Instagram, where you already know what your long-term reward looks like for your effort, everything becomes hyper-superficial. Because we are talking about long-term rewards like relationships, career, friendships, and basically contentment. This is, I guess, a generalized view of success.
It is virtually fed to us without any effort as such. We are constantly bombarded with new narratives. To the point that now only a handful of people control their own life’s narrative at a young age.
That is because we have come to the point where we have to judge, make an opinion, reflect, get anxious, have FOMO, and feel hundreds of different things just by looking at a single frame of this person’s life whom you don’t even know. That gives you an identity FOMO. Which is that you want this particular part of their life into your own identity that you feel like you are missing out on, right now.
Everyone is constantly making perceptions of you only with the limited knowledge they have. And you want that perception to be as good as it could possibly be.
So, you put your desired self online. A perfect self that you wish existed. Nothing wrong with that, if everyone is doing it. Since now our status is directly linked with our Instagram profile.
You put yourself exactly how you want the world to see you. Only so that by likes and a few comments you can assess your self-worth.
And of course, I am not talking about you. I know you are just on Instagram for your friends. I get that. We are talking about other people.
All humans are insecure.
The most common insecurity is looks. Everyone was insecure about this at some point, at least. Now, we added another layer of insecurity on top of it with filters. It ‘enhances’ your image to make you look even more beautiful (seriously, stfu!).
These filters make your insecurity invisible for a second. But now, it has made you more conscious of that insecurity. Which leads it to go deeper into your psyche. That’s good if it makes you realize that’s what it is and you’re amazing just the way you are (courtesy Bruno Mars). It turns bad when it leads to a downward spiral of realizing your hundred other insecurities. Which also have their solution in the hut of realization and acceptance.
Now, I’m not here to give your just another identity crisis (or maybe I am?).
We should talk about the other side of the coin, another side of superficiality i.e. substance. It is an uncommon word but it actually is what matters.
As the name suggests, the substance is the actual value. Your superpowers which you don't have to assert. Since individuals who actually have power, don't assert it. For example, an entrepreneur with no real product won’t shut up about her/his founding story.
Again, don't confuse asserting with selling yourself. Initially, you have to put yourself out there. Make yourself seen and make people realize your potential. After a point, real ones will automatically see through the real substance.
Your substance is what actually gets you somewhere in life. It makes you a player to play the game of life. When you go through the furnace of pain and hardships. You come out as a player on the other side.
Then, game attracts game. You inevitably surround yourself with people who actually have some substance. Who is better than you, who can add value to your life, with whom you will become a better version of yourself, and with whom you can learn to live life.
I was discussing with a friend about creating something valuable and I sent this message [img] to him, which he ended up saving in his notes, upon what comes before creating or building something in life that is actually meaningful and you actually want to create. Where you are not living in the fantasy of being an artist or entrepreneur, but you genuinely want to do it with your heart. When you don’t care about anything else. When you no longer need to learn “How to get into flow state—”.
You will know when you genuinely want to do something when you stop asking all the “How to—” and make your craft.
You will know.